What if...

I began an exciting new endeavor today: substitute teaching. Wooo-hooo!

I completed my orientation last week (and by orientation, I mean, filled out paperwork...you'd probably be shocked at how little information subs are given before they're thrown to the wolves!), and my name officially entered the call-out system late yesterday. The guy who orientated? us encouraged everyone to be patient, he said it could take quite awhile before we had an opportunity to work, after all, there are over 1300 subs in this county's system.

Got my first job at 6:45 a.m. today. Somehow, when he said be patient and don't be discouraged by the wait, I thought the "wait" he was referring to would be longer than 12 hours. I'm glad I was wrong, I was so anxious to get started! Crazy, I know. I accepted the job at 6:45, still in my pjs, but was out the door with both kids by 7:18. But my hair was dirty. From now on I will go to bed with fresh hair so that doesn't happen again.

I have a feeling substituting will give me some great blog-fodder. I've been a little sparse lately, but nothing like an ever-changing stream of public school children to shake life up a bit!

I've already accepted a job to be an art teacher on Friday. Yep, that's gonna be a good one...

I was tagged by Steph to do this fun blog activity...go to your fourth photo file, grab the fourth picture and blog about it.

Dyed my hair black today.

Don't tell me to shut up. I totally did.

Well, Gina did. I'm home-hair-color ignorant, and in her words, she's not new to this rodeo.

But before you (and by you, I mean my Mom) get too distressed, keep in mind David was in the house 10 minutes before he noticed, and even then it was after the kids brought it to his attention...so it must not be too dramatic. Not at all goth. I think my hair was darker than I realized so "Purest Black" was just a short jump away, and my "new" hair matches my natural eyebrows perfectly.

This may or may not have anything to do with the 3 gray hairs I've been eye-balling all week.

And no, David is not in the dog house over the not noticing issue, 'cause I'm still mooney-eyed over some really sweet stuff he said to me yesterday. (I like to bank the good stuff, not the bad.) He's totally been paying attention as Pastor preached from Song of Solomon. And since he hears each sermon 4 times, it's a darn good thing I'm seeing some application!

Have you ever noticed how great your hair fixes the day you're scheduled to get a new hair cut? I may lose the guys on this one. You get so sick of your same old look, decide to take the plunge, call the salon, make an appointment and promise yourself you will not walk out with just a trim. Then it happens. Maybe the day of, maybe the day before...you wash your hair, blow dry it out and it lays beautifully, fixes like it hasn't fixed in weeks. Your husband gives a compliment, your friends ask what you've done differently...and you begin to second guess whether or not you're really ready for a change. Maybe it's not so bad. Maybe you should stick with your long locks, or your bob or your pixie, your perm or your color for just one more season.

I'm not really thinking about hair tonight. That analogy just works for my life right now. Something important in my life just didn't "fit" anymore, and I knew it, actually for months. Maybe I'd outgrown it...or maybe it had outgrown me. Finally made the tough call, even put it in black and white so I couldn't talk myself out of it. But just like the hair that suddenly looks fresh and vibrant again, I began to second guess my decision. Maybe it would be okay for just one more season. Transitions can be so hard to navigate. What now? doesn't seem to be any easier to answer than What if?

But I am keenly aware that my What now? leaves room for God's What's next.

And He doesn't punctuate with a question mark.

I hate back-blogging. You know...going a couple of weeks without blogging and then trying to play catch up?! Just stresses me out. I'm gonna bullet point a few key thoughts, then move on!

- I had a conference with Lily's teacher. I had to bite my lip to hold back tears as the teacher talked about Lily's recent improvements in writing and her mother-hen personality. Lily's teacher really gets her. Last year's teacher, though very nice, never seemed to know my Lily. Every conversation we had felt like it could have been about anyone's child. But as this teacher spoke about my Lily, I knew it was my girl she was thinking of and talking about, and that was the best feeling in the world. Trusting your child to a stranger is one thing, feeling like that stranger wants to stay a stranger is another...but seeing a stranger become a friend to your child...well, it's just much, much better.

- I really dislike dead batteries...I need two AAAs for my wireless keyboard, a 9V for Luke's RC truck... but I especially dislike the kind that cost $75 and are necessary for cranking an SUV. I do however get a good laugh when I think of me and Sewtrendi trying to figure out how to use jumper cables. That's probably worth the money right there. One day I'll be a "do it all" kind of chick, but I have a long way to go!

- As I've been catching up on blogs, I think I've read everything I would ever say about Catalyst on the blogs of others. I have been sufficiently "beat to the punch" so I'll just say what I haven't read on any other blog, which is how great it was to eat hotel lounge take out with my hubby in a plush, white king size bed at 10 o'clock at night while watching SNL reruns. Probably not the most spiritual Catalyst take away, but definitely in my top 5 moments from the conference trip. And it certainly deserves repeating what many others have said, our Pastor did an amazing job at Catalyst. The only thing the overwhelmingly powerful experience lacked was tissues. Clapping through an emotional standing ovation while wiping teary eyes and a snotty nose on one's own sweater is not as dignified a moment as you might think.

- Watching my parents over-indulge Lily and Luke with Wal-Mart goodies, dollar store junk, souvenir-shop stuffed animals and sweets of all sorts never gets old. Maybe it would if we still lived just 2 houses away from them, but 600 miles later, in the brief visits we get, I love it almost as much as the kids do. Sure I have to play the part of the stern parent and limit late-night donuts to just a half, but I love the mutual enjoyment those 4 characters find in one another. And speaking of spoiled, my parents drove 8 hours to babysit for us so we could attend Catalyst. I'd feel really guilty if it wasn't for the way my parents somehow make us feel like we're doing them a favor by pawning those crazy kids off on them. Thanks, Mom and Dad.

Wow, has it really been so long since my last post? #11 has been up for 11 days!? This isn't a real post either, it's just a pseudo-post to help out my 4 faithful readers who are tired of seeing that last post pop up.

We have filled the past 11 days with at least a month's worth of "stuff" so it may take me awhile to unpack and blog again. And by unpack, I mean my brain and my luggage...and I hate unpacking. More so the luggage than the brain, but that can be an unpleasant task too.

While passing a fast food restaurant that recently caught fire, I seized the opportunity to talk to the kids about fire safety, fire prevention and the heroism of fire fighters. Yes, yes, I know...that's just darn good parenting. Luke was very curious about what causes fire and while I talked through the many accidental causes of fire, I also told them that some fires are intentionally set. I said, Setting a fire on purpose is called arson.


There was silence in the backseat for a few seconds...then Lil spoke up.


It's also called (dramatic pause)....sin.

Luke and I were cuddled up in David's recliner reading a book about honey bees. Couldn't we all learn a little more about honey bees? I can't quote it verbatim, but the page about worker bees said something along the lines of: Worker bees are busy all day and rest only at night. Worker bees keep the hive clean. They take care of the queen bee and the eggs. Worker bees blah, blah, worker bees, blah, blah...

As I rattled off several simple sentences about the very industrious worker bees, Lily, who was in the kitchen, yelled out, Mom, that sounds like you.

Ya think? Am I a worker bee?, I replied.

Well, not a bee...a worker mommy!, she giggled back at me.

My typical m.o. would be to let mommy guilt wreck that moment, Oh no! The kids think I'm too busy, I don't give them enough attention. They'll be headed off to college before I know it. I've got to do some holiday baking with them this Christmas or they'll end up in therapy.

But instead, I just let it rest on me with ease, as my precious 6 year old's way of saying, She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness. Proverbs 31:17 & 27.

Thanks for noticing, my Lily, my love.